How to make a Quasi Private Ferry Company, that you own but have no say in how it is run, in only two days! Just follow the following 9 easy steps, and you are on your way to smooth sailing.

First, pass a law that says our crown corporation, BC Ferries, will become a private company, independent from government.

Then, on Day 1, follow these easy steps:

Step 1 Transfer all the crown land, foreshore, water lots, terminals, berths, & parking lots to the BC Transportation Financing Authority (BCTFA). Be sure to have the Minister of Transportation and the Land and Water BC guy there to sign documents.

Step 2 Have BCTFA give BC Ferries a promissory note for $330 million for this transfer of assets. Make sure you get the amount right.

Step 3 Have BCTFA charge $330 million for a 60-year lease on the berths & terminals. Make sure BCTFA retains possession of the land.

Step 4 Have BC Ferries give back the $330 million promissory note to prepay the lease. Voila! The little problem of not being able to give a private company crown land is solved.

Step 5 At the stroke of midnight change your name. You’ll wake up tomorrow as the new private BC Ferry Services Inc with all the assets that just yesterday belonged to the people of the BC!

Begin Day 2 with a cappuccino and a good hearty breakfast.

Step 6 Reorganize the new company’s share structure. Make sure you have 80,000 preferred shares with a value of $1,000 each handy.

Step 7 Get a big loan. Issue a debenture in the favour of the Province of BC in the amount of $427.7 million. Secure this debt with a registered mortgage against all your assets (the ferries and the prepaid lease).

Step 8 Redeem 100% of your outstanding shares held by the Minister of Finance in exchange for the preferred shares and enough cash ($427.7 million, actually, imagine that!) to equal your company’s equity value of $503 million.

Step 9 You have just reduced the company’s value from $503 to $75.5 million.

Now you are done, it is smooth sailing because you are guaranteed a return by law!
It’s as easy as that!

By Nelle Maxey